The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
