After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
