How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Randomize
