i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize
