i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Randomize
