I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
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no one should ever give us hovercrafts
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.