I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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