I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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