either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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