He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
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