Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Randomize
