Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
accomplished twins. life is a go
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
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