This girl is more easily done than said...
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize