Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
