Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
