My underwear smells like fireworks.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
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