I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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