thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
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Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
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