Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize