his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Randomize
