Well apparently he's into motor boating.
She's JV to your varsity
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
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