just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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