Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
