u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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