Soap is not a condiment
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Randomize
