..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
