I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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