you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
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Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
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I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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