So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Sext me about skeletons
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize