is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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