you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
My vagina is officially offended.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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