Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
