The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
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