I feel like I'm in dance class right now
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize