There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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