best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
True strength comes from lack of pants
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
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