i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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