i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
