I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
