Just fell off a train. Bad.
"it" just moved
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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