I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
