does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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