During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
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i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
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I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
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