I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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