it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
