i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Randomize
