This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Randomize
