Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
