i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
