I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize