My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
